Last year, during our ridiculously long, hundred-day Nightmare Fuel, we were finally introduced to the classic Diabolique. It was a hit with at least me (I can only assume at least some of yinz as well, right?), and the Criterion Blu-ray sits as a member of my collection. It was only natural that I’d remember the remake from the middle of the ‘90s from my now distant-feeling past and take a run at it this year to see how it holds up against its predecessor. Not sure what I expected, exactly, but I certainly got something, indeed.
The basic plot is quite the same as the original: A battered schoolmistress with a weak heart plots with her husband’s mistress to kill the son of a bitch. They head out to the country for a holiday weekend and do just that, drowning the bastard in a bathtub. Stashing the body on school grounds, the women attempt to return to their lives, only to find themselves apparently haunted by the scoundrel. Whether it’s mere guilt manifesting itself somewhat physically or an actual spectral phenomenon, though, is the real mystery at hand.
Where this version differs – and suffers – is in the overall execution of the story at pretty much every level. Let’s start with the acting. Véra Clouzot and Simone Signoret absolutely shined as the original headmistress and mistress, with a torrid chemistry that can’t easily be expressed in simple relationship terms. Here, we get a tepid, forced pairing between the exaggeratedly ailing Isabelle Adjani and Sharon Stone, who, still riding somewhat high after the success of Basic instinct, is trying way too hard to come across as something of a sexpot – when she’s not trying equally as hard to seem intense and intimidating. It’s all strangely half-hearted looking, as though whatever all-too-large amounts of effort they put into their performances were actually as hollow as they sound. Not helping matters is a dreadfully out-of-place Chazz Palminteri as the ostensibly brutal husband/prey. Sure, he’s decently abusive at times, but it never feels all-encompassing, as though he’s doing nothing but tormenting his wife at all times, at every opportunity, as Paul Meurisse did back in the ‘50s. Indeed, half the time he just looks tired or bored, waiting for the sweet relief that’s about to come his way.
Then there’s the overall feel of the picture. Not to belabor the comparison between this version and the original, but the latter oscillated between nigh-on bucolic slice of life (for a small bit of time, anyway) and dark, spooky potboiler; this remake, on the other hand, plays out like the backwash of a trashy erotic thriller. For whatever reason, the filmmakers thought it a good idea to include plenty of nudity (sexy and otherwise) and some sex scenes, I assume in an effort to fully capitalize on Stone’s participation, and these bits completely drown whatever threadbare thrilling aspects were there to begin with. The murder scene goes on far too long, becoming almost comical by the end (plus, they just had to make it more graphic, didn’t they?), and the children have a dramatically reduced collective role. There’s nothing clever or interesting here, just a watering-down of the original fringed by some mild ‘90s aesthetics.
Bottom line: If you wanna see Diabolique, stick with the original. And then some. Lord.
Allusions of Grandeur 